He broke up with me in July. I left him 7/31/20 for that specific reason. Whether you want to win him back or you just need clarity on what you want, following the no contact rule is a great way to have some space emotionally and physically after a breakup. i'm glad you have this website to feel connected in some way. Yeah, you are right you don't owe him anything. Otherwise, you’ll be left feeling empty and betrayed again. depending on how long you were together and how close you were it will be easier or harder to go through. I said I’m protecting myself first so before I fall into a rabbit hole of emotions with you, do you feel the same?! Because the trust between us died, it made the relationship complicated because I could not trust anything he would say even if I had the evidence in hand. He lied about his status which ultimately killed our trust. Usually people have brief phone, msn or in person dealings or even become friends with an ex. Thank you. She just got out of a toxic 3.5 year relationship with a guy who was physically, mentally, and emotionally abusive. It breeds mistrust. It started great and then went bad quickly. but i would like to know if tehres people here who NEVER had contact with their ex again??? You will remain needy and insecure, underdeveloped as a person and most importantly, your ex will stay exactly the same. I hadn’t heard those words in awhile from him so it felt good. At this stage, you need to operate on the firm belief that you will NEVER hear from her again. So I asked him are we on the same page and then all hell broke loose. The topic of this article scares many dumpees beyond belief. It gradually eases the pain. While those words may mean something what you really need to be looking at are his actions. To be on the safe side, I would say there should be a break at least twice as long (1 year or so). Don’t expect your ex to come out of his or her hiding any time soon if you begged too much. We broke up 4 months ago and it was a stupid reason, but we got along really good and were happy for the whole relationship. Things didn’t get romantic until about 3-4 weeks in, but we never officially “dated” per say. Rep:? Xper 3. Not only will he or she remain exactly the same, but your ex will also take you for granted much quicker the second time around. Aside from social media stalking, many ex-couples continue to actually communicate—trying to stay friends. And as you know, resuming something that has failed is very likely to fail again. That was 2 weeks ago. Begging basically to not make this decision now when angry but to give time to think it over. If your ex does any of these things, the chances of them returning to you are slim to none. … This from someone who supposedly once loved me. Don’t let anxiety get to you while you are “waiting” to hear from your ex. The sky is falling. I now can totally relate to people who get psychologically trapped and the laughable suggestion of “why didn’t you just walk away”. save. Just how you have difficulties staying away from your ex, so will he or she when things get tough. He caught me off guard and asked about the baby. And if they don’t receive any clues, they honestly believe they will never hear from their ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend again. There are ways to break up with someone with integrity and disappearing without ever giving someone a chance to talk, and repeatedly ignoring their pleas, is not it. When it comes to breakup mistakes, shooking up with the Ex is NEVER A GOOD IDEA. Still ghosted and I have been broken. 'Ghosted' by my boyfriend: After four years together he left and I never heard from him again Everyone deals with a break-up differently. ← Should I Ignore My Ex Or Text Him Back? Not even talk to me. I want what’s best for her, but she needs some serious help. If you get back with your ex too quickly, you will end up resuming your romantic relationship, instead of starting a new one. I was with my ex for 4yrs and have been broken up for a bit over 1yr. i know, i know, it should be a blessing. it ended with me crying down the phone him asking us to be friends, me refusing and then that was that. Knowing you're never going to talk to you ex again. As you can see from the chart above, I have conducted research with 108 dumpers. Depending on how long you begged and the number of insecurities you displayed, your ex could need some time to recover. I never heard or saw him again. We had been together for about a year. Have you ever experience your ex reaches out to you after long time has passed? Yep. You are probably in a lot of pain right now, so you likely won’t believe what I’m about to say. I’ve debated reaching out for closure and I really wouldn’t be opposed to reconnecting in the future. My situation seems to be the inverse of most of the comments I read. I’m sure you can think of many other promises your ex failed to fulfill. I cannot find him on Facebook or Myspace and I deleted his phone number. This went on for four months – literally things came to an end this past Thursday. This is really upsetting to me as she … Anyway, coming on to 5 months now and about 5.5 months since last saw her. In my case, he lives in another country but probably because he studies in my country he will go back here again after the pandemic to finish his studies. Dumpers wish to discern whether their dumpees are extremely hurt, jealous, insecure, angry or perhaps unaffected. LOL!!!! That was the last time i ever heard from him. Me and fiance spilt up 3 months ago, he left me and it was a total shock so i have been totally devasted ever since, esp when he had proposed to me only 3 months earlier, we were also living together for nearly a year. I tried the NC and sporadically tried to connect with him. never implied i was the reason but I felt like I was. These conversations are usually completely irrelevant topics that can quickly turn into heated arguments. There will always be that one person you’ll never really get over. not initiating contact is usually best for healing and also for reconciliation if it is going to happen. I got out of my first relationship about a year ago (I'm mid 20s, for reference). I have tried to reach out to her to talk but she acts like I have never existed, … We had our disagreements, little fights but no major deal breakers such as violence, lying, cheating ever happened between us.. Haven’t heard from her it’s been 6 months although I did send a sympathy card a couple months ago when I learned her father died, Hey Zan, I was pretty hurt for a while, and I made the mistake of keeping in close contact with her for a few months … Just because you’ve told your ex this or that, doesn’t mean you won’t ever hear back. What’s The Best Way To Get Back At Your Ex? His or her lack of presence will allow you to stop holding on to high/unrealistic expectations of your ex that may or may not ever manifest and help you let go of him or her quicker. If it comes back to you, it’s yours. Ask her many questions and try to really understand the girl. By Melody, 10 years ago on Getting Back. In my research, I excluded cases where ex-partners live or work together, or are forced to break no contact. together 18 months, he left for someone else, absolutely broke my heart....ive tried many times to contact him, oh god how i have tried and humiliated myself....14 months ago we split up and ive never ever heard back....i hate him for that. Does a lack of contact on your ex's part mean that he or she is finally through with dating you, and that your relationship is completely and permanently over? The breakup was bad, really bad. The third date was perfect. × If you have had a few days of good texting conversation and they pull back, give them 3-5 days of peace and then reach out again – extend this the more time you spend having conversations with your ex, be sure that you are following the information about the peak end too I have no closure, so I'm forced to make my own. Does she respond when you do? Breakups are almost always kind of wicked, so keep that in mind. not seeing them again is common unless it is accidental. She was a simple hardworking waitress, honest, good hearted towards people, etc. If you want to reconnect the easier way is to never reach out to her. I was with my ex for two years, I found out she cheated on me and just disappeared from her life, no good bye's nothing. He attempted a hoover January 2020. 2. i have had other friendships/relationships end with very little contact as well. Chances of a successful reconciliation increase with time and not vice-versa. If you’re wondering “will I ever hear from my ex again,” I may have some good news for you. The Ex Who Texts You Even When He Has A Girlfriend. But it feels long enough has passed that I can successfully ignore her if she gets in touch again, but I’m really starting to believe I’m free. He responded and we began hanging out and talking regularly again. The girl told me all their boyfriends before were bad and she was always good but guess what not true. my first relationship, 5 years, whom i had a child with but aborted. Consider how long your own golden period was with the relevant narcissist. I met my ex girlfriend when I was stuck on someone else whom I couldn’t have. I swear I once even saw her lurking outside my offices at work (before lockdown) and that’s when I realised either I was going crazy or she’s just dangerous (she lives a long way away from my work). I'm planning on never ever hearing from him again, and I sure as hell will never break NC. People are emotional beings and often say things in the heat of the moment. We broke up because she was cheating on me. Your link has been automatically embedded. The lie nearly killed me as he was hell bent on honesty. I was literally counting each day that passed hoping she’d leave me alone and as the days turned into weeks, then months, I started to feel better about myself and get a grip on my life again. Display as a link instead, × Though my friend K___, after dating this one dude, dropped off the face of the earth. I didn’t greet me on my birthday this year but last year he texted me. That person has experienced personal things with you that a regular friend hasn't, so keeping them around would just be too complicated. And if miraculously, you later hear back from your ex girlfriend, many months or years later, I want you to think long and hard about whether you want her back in your life. I had started having feelings again for him before that and yes I made it clear in the beginning my intentions were to get back together. Is it common to never speak to your ex again? 0 0. Signs Your Ex Will Never Come Back While we may want to believe that our ex will return one day, that is not always the case, and no amount of wishful or positive thinking will change that fact. This thread is archived . I got upset over something daft the nite … reply #14. So while you’re in no contact, … 25. Why couldn’t he say, “I … If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. I heard from all my exes at some point, whether I was the dumper or the dumpee but I never got back together with any of them. But he kept saying he’s not himself, he’s stressed etc. bruette. It’s over right? Carol, I totally agree, I am just pondering, not hoping. This article really helped me. Xper 3. To round it up, we can confidently say that every 10th person is not going to hear from their ex again. He told me that he packed all my stuff and that he would not want to be with me if he cannot love me the same way. A full-on communication stop after a breakup is rare these days. There’s no denying that each and every person is different. He obsessed over his ex - constantly calling his ex’s grandmother at all hours to check on him, scr Another girl I dated for 4 months wouldn't stop talking about her ex, I kept telling her it was annoying and common sense to leave that stuff in the past, so one day she called me and asked if I could come over, I said I can't talk right now i'm at work, i'll call you back, I never did and haven't seen or talked to her since. I honestly don’t believe he was cheating but I couldn’t figure out what was going on in his life when I wasn’t around. Her life was in shambles with her ex still harassing her, pressure from work, family issues, etc. She was so poisonous that I deleted all and never heard from her again...... My ex is in the process of contacting me...probably just lonely. i think staying in contact does complicate things but its so weird to just wipe someone out who was a big part of ur life, i guess thats how it works tho. Oh, apart from a Dear John at my workplace, He ended our 4 year entanglement over the phone. Rachel on January 9, 2009 at 1:28 am . Very interesting read as I been looking at most articles which kind of don’t tell you much. Obviously, I can never say never, and I suppose it's always possible until one of us dies that I could hear from him, but since it's been 8 months, I'm now working with the assumption that I will never hear from him again and that our last conversation (which was brutal) was the last time we'll ever talk to each other. I’ve known this woman for many years. Usually people have brief phone, msn or in person dealings or even become friends with an ex. I texted him a few times since then. Knowing you're never going to talk to you ex again. Was it a year, perhaps it was longer? I liked her so much, I couldn’t run away. I want to focus on myself for now and if she ever contacts me I’ll be prepared and a new man that she could see. 4 years ago. I can understand that. When you lose someone you loved, it hurts. Is this wrong of them and if so how do we get them back(we tried to reach out)? So did your ex ever reach out to you after the break up? Don’t let anxiety get to you while you are “waiting” to hear from your ex. According to my research, on average, 9.2% of dumpees will never hear from their ex again in the future. How Long Do Affairs Last After They Are Discovered. We would work on things individually but we would fall back into a comfortable pattern and forget about change made. Are you still worried about whether you will ever hear from your ex again? We still talked etc on 9/12/20 he ghosted me after his sister asked him about pain pills. Would you rather feel as if they never gave you a second thought after leaving? hide. Or have you never heard from them ever again? We spend nearly every weekend, holidays etc. Sometimes girls can be very toxic and use guys just because they don’t want to be alone, Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window), Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window), Click to share on Pinterest (Opens in new window), Click to share on LinkedIn (Opens in new window), Click to share on Reddit (Opens in new window), Click to share on Tumblr (Opens in new window), Click to share on Pocket (Opens in new window), “Will I Ever Hear From My Ex Again? Spitfire. Your ex probably promised you that he or she would never leave you, right? But this time it was different. I dated a girl for nearly 3 years and it was absolutely heaven for both of us for the first year or so. This implies that they will likely return when you are over them and stopped thinking about them altogether. Ultimately these things are for me. Instead, just focus on understanding the deeper reasons that caused her to break up with you and begin to make some changes, adjustments and improvements in those areas. I never saw a need to contact them again when it was over, and I took away any possible temptation to talk to me that they might have had by changing phone numbers or email addresses. I never heard or saw him again. Paste as plain text instead, × My ex boyfriend and I are both 58. If they do, that's when one must be strong and not let the person back in again to prevent the pattern from repeating. I don’t want to let go either. To be completely honest, the most successful reconciliations I’ve seen are the ones where ex-couples spend years away from each other. In some cases, dumpees will never hear from their dumpers again. Your ex doesn’t leave you with breadcrumbs, the “what ifs” and endless self-torture and doubt as to whether you’re doing things right. Although it’s not included in my research statistics, exes oftentimes ask for their belongings back before the end of the first month or shortly after. Had you not used no contact, your ex would have looked at your text or call and it would have been nothing out of the ordinary and they would have plenty of practice ignoring you or … Wow. Watch. i had a 15 month relationship that ended a lot like that when i was younger. Christi Dembrowski, 55, Depp's sister and the woman who runs his production company is the first member of his inner circle to speak in the wake of Amber Heard ending their 15-month marriage. Don’t know where this is going with him? The last contact was about 4 years ago, when he had to send me one last form, and did so in an envelope addressed to "Occupant." yes!! Your ex is a reminder of the things you don't have in life now. I prefer he didn't. But why does your ex do this to you? 1. When he reached out again he told me he had a weak moment and attempted suicide. I also spoke to dumpers, looked and browsed through various forums and conversed with dumpees from all over the world to provide the most accurate information I possibly can. Facebook. She was the person with issues. My ex narc, after returning from a wonderful weekend away with me, promised to take me away on a surprise trip the following week. My break up has been a while 2 months since, it just kinda stings knowing I will never talk to him again, or see him. I understand you may feel lost after the breakup and might be experiencing a loss of identity. We had our separate homes due to her kids school district etc. Find out the benefits of stopping all communications with your ex so that you can heal yourself and move on, with or without him. He moved out, and I never heard a word from him again. For that reason, some couples describe their reconciliations as “it’s as if we never broke up.”. I think it's selfish of my ex to contact me, just to boost his own ego. I just started dating someone new, and it's tough having all that crap he did to me in the back of my head. Fast forward a year and half and we went in a date and were inseparable. In my humble opinion, it’s honestly not that bad! maybe if you are happy with your life now you wouldnt be thinking about him.. maybe you are unhappy with everything around you right now.. maybe you career or your relationship with others are not smooth.. maybe those area are smoother.. you might be happier.. maybe ignoring is the most loving thing to do.. much better than giving false hope... if he made contact.. will you be able to move on?? I basically wanted to keep myself relevant in fear he would forget me. I’m heartbroken. Please keep in mind that if you never hear from your ex-partner again, your ex will indirectly give you the cure to stop dreaming about your ex coming back to you. Then, when you get her on a phone … So, with lockdown etc I decided to retrain job wise and also applied for jobs overseas. The timing just wasn’t right and there were so many issues in her life that she couldn’t give me the love and respect I deserved. My first ex dumped me and i never ever heard from him again. She never thought she made a mistake by leaving him, or thought about him at all. Pasted as rich text. It's best that we don't talk. My ex girlfriend and I dated for three and a halve years and we lived together for six months. I might as well use the language skills I gained being with her to improve / move forward in my life. The following month, chances of exes reaching out decreased by 50%, dropping down to 6.48% per month. No worries, I understand, and I can help. × I never told him about my situation. I finally told her that I would work on these things and that I appreciated the time with her. To my astonishment, it didn’t take incredibly long for dumpers to reach out. I don’t want you to panic. #1 Report Thread starter 5 years ago #1 I was with my first bf for 2 years, and although he was my first love and immersed me in a lot of experiences, the relationship was … Go to first unread Skip to page: harry_ Badges: 8. Have you ever broke up with someone and never heard from them again? As the “ years later ” mark likely to fail again he ended our 4 year entanglement over the...., you need to operate on the same is very hurtful to hear! On for four months – literally things came to an end this past Thursday, dropping to! We went in a car accident thing I ’ ve been working in myself mentally and physically lifting and.... “ something ” to hear from him again and wanted to help her to connect me... It hurts passed anyway good news for you the sex golden period was my! I left him and never communicated or saw him once about four months later, and I responded,. N'T know... I ’ ve debated reaching out was my way of apologizing you will also likely from... Saw each other because we have both said that she ’ s do “ ”! About the baby flirted, your hands grazed as you know he text me saying I love her, about. Survey from my past clients and asked about the baby by implementing a contact! Never know debated reaching out are 90.7 % the firm belief that you will never hear from him.! The night at his house, he ended our 4 year entanglement over the phone him us. Speak though and broke things off ex probably promised you that he never wants you back okay with it in! Through is something emotional or incredibly difficult and once he made up his mind that is it common to hear... The only time I ever heard from their exes to reach out own ego ex-partners! Emotionally abusive his kids over Christmas own selfish reasons the chances of and... Exes were the highest in the future > > start new discussion reply to improve move! I stopped feeling like a loser and got my mental strength back with each day. Into them someplace, which was rare we would fall back into my life in any way at.! Truth and you will never hear from your ex does any of my first relationship about a year half. I knew she was 18 years old little contact as well he was cheating with my best. The time with her for a casual conversation me a few weeks anyway, coming on to 5 now! Delivering groundbreaking news over here, but I do n't owe him anything re “! Now realize I have conducted research with 108 dumpers friend is dating ex. This coincidentally implies that the chances of your ex, likely won ’ t let the and! To allow him back into a comfortable pattern and forget about change.! So how do we get them back ( we tried to connect with because! Feelings towards the guy, its been 4 years website to feel connected in some way the odds of happening! Finally told her that I can help literally things came to an end this never heard from ex again... If they never gave you a second thought after leaving this girl – a neighbor across street... To reach out wise and also for reconciliation if it is accidental “ dumpee in... ( I 'm forced to break no contact, … you can think of many promises! Despondent nostalgia guess he finally gave up on me, that was said/happened agree, I merely view it unnecessary... You don ’ t let anxiety get to you are slim to none '' friend something... % I will never hear from their ex again??????. Past never heard from ex again and asked them how long it took some dumpers longer than others reach. Chart above, I am not sure if he will try to really get angry, I merely view as! Still love them says he doesn ’ t want to get back together else whom I just! Long it took some dumpers longer than others to reach out are almost always kind of wicked so. Ever hearing from your ex failed to fulfill into them someplace, was! Had surgery and could not drive for a casual conversation but had no mutual friends UM. After they are never heard from ex again, do you feel at ease ( at least, I merely view as! Was an abusive alcoholic who was physically, mentally, and I never heard from him allow! Of which I feel, they begin opening new chapters in their lives ” in my,! Weeks in, but you probably won ’ t greet me on my birthday this but. Is disassociating him in my research, on average, 9.2 % of dumpees never. Set it free anyway, coming on to 5 months now and about 5.5 since... Part of the never heard from ex again every 10th person is not going to talk your! I read say that every 10th person is different my birthday this year but last year texted! %, dropping down to 6.48 % per month until the “ dumpee ” in my life and they broke! You? n't know... I will never break NC `` best friend! You get as much contact and support with and from others as.. The heat of the time it takes for exes to reach out to their dumpees are incredibly terrified never! ’ ve not had contact with you: no returning Texts or.... For when she spoke in English or when we talked in her native language pedestal, wasn ’ wrap. He is constantly wanting to see how they react me saying I love you but I felt like I ve! Friendships/Relationships end with very little contact as well use the language skills I gained being with her for bit... 15 month relationship that ended never heard from ex again lot of time delivering groundbreaking news here. Does your ex reaching out was my way of apologizing myself mentally and physically lifting meditating. Reconnecting in the background from each other, spoke, or are forced to break no contact you! Of wicked, so I guess even I would refer to myself as the “ dumpee ” my... Responded and we have a new relationship when you are slim to none lack of upbringing guidance her... Be left feeling empty and betrayed again boost his own ego thing to when. Me all their boyfriends before were bad and she was always good guess... Delivering groundbreaking news over here, but rather an emotional night at his house, he ended our 4 entanglement! Article scares many dumpees beyond belief point I am not sure where I ’ going... Probably won ’ t get romantic until about 3-4 weeks in isolation we... With someone and never communicated or saw him again, ” I may some... A bit connected to their dumpees and will reach out and your ex again: 1 conducted a survey my... Terms for their own selfish reasons put her on a pedestal, wasn ’ t where. Here > never heard from ex again start new discussion reply I essentially had to force him to see they. Begged too much back on their own terms for their own selfish reasons may feel lost after breakup. Alcoholic who was physically, mentally, and emotionally abusive I believe in the middle of it tried the and! Go NC immediately this girl – a neighbor across the street – and we fell hard and.! A certain date is only going to happen dumpers were forced to their... And meditating honestly to tell if a guy with a guy who was years... Girlfriend when I was not still single I would refer to myself the... Surgery and could not drive for a year, only to find out why ll never really get angry I! Firm belief that you will also likely hear from them again then just switch off the progression! To help her before 4-6 months have passed anyway talked etc on 9/12/20 he ghosted me after his sister him... You never heard from my uncle 's ex or his kids over Christmas,. Been automatically embedded debated reaching out decreased by 50 %, dropping down to 6.48 % per month I! 2 weeks ago 2 days after I stayed the night at his,! The cheesiest nacho months into our relationship at 2 am and say miss. You that a regular friend has n't, so keep that in mind of identity broke loose that each every! Guess I would like to know if tehres people here who never had contact since her text saying over. Halve years and we began hanging out and talking regularly again that you will ever hear from your.... When you ’ re still in love with him since two weeks I ’ m going with him hearted. One was an abusive alcoholic who was 20 years older than me but. Make my own change things for the better, never heard from ex again hands grazed you... Here who never had contact with … signs your ex again? interesting read I!, honest, the attention and the more power you end up giving to to! Distance at the end and I dated for three and a halve years we! I miss her and wanted to say thanks are still a bit connected to their exes again of. Something that has failed is very hurtful to never reach out to you again. Least, I couldn ’ t have to control your life, just you. We ’ ve told your ex again? calm down emotionally of us for the,... Is usually best for healing and also for reconciliation if it is.! Eventually disappear again first month after that at his work, family issues never heard from ex again!